The Power of Being Alone

“I’m surrounded by people, but there’s no one I can open up to and share my troubles with… I wish someone could give me the answers I need.” If this sounds like something you’d say, ask our M.o.M. Suh Yoon! Email us at ask@yoooon.com. We’ll publish the best questions with Suh Yoon’s answers here in YooooN magazine.

 

Q: I carefully read the Guru’s answer about the luck diary (see Issue 2, Ask Suh Yoon). First, I’d like to say thank you to the Guru. I’ve been keeping a luck diary and have seen some remarkable changes.

Before starting the diary, I felt I was never lucky. My friends spoke of raises, new jobs or stock gains, but nothing like that ever seemed to happen to me.

I began to view my life differently thanks to the Guru. I realized I have good luck nearly every day. I am indeed a lucky person!

For instance, I had the good fortune to get the last box of macaroons at a famous shop last week. Then, when I went to the fish section of the supermarket to buy salmon, I saw on a sign that it was on sale. I received unexpected help from a colleague when writing a report last week. Misaki from the next room gave me a report analyzing the market for the past 5 years. I was able to finish work early thanks to her.

I felt my life changing as I kept writing notes. I now begin every day happy and excited thanks to the Guru and end each day full of gratitude. One small habit has changed my life.

Is there any other way I can develop my good fortune?

-Etsuko from Tokyo, Japan

Q: I used to work for a multinational pharmaceutical firm, then founded a health care startup at the beginning of last year. Like most entrepreneurs, I handle management and marketing myself.

Fortunately, my business has been successful. Networking since the beginning has helped. I’ve had work from hospital directors and teaching hospital professors I’ve met. I took home enough to cover my monthly expenses last month, and my working hours are stable without many late nights.

I ought to be hopeful and enthusiastic at a time like this, but I have been feeling emotionally depleted. I meet a lot of people at work and that takes a great deal of energy.

I have 4-5 meetings every week, including lunches. I need to stay on the ball with clients to understand how they feel and how to relieve the anxieties they mention. It leaves me drained and too tired to do anything after I leave work. All I have energy for is to drink beer and stare at the TV or phone until bedtime.

My emotions are starting to dull. I didn’t even feel anything when a client called me last week to offer work. I would previously have been over the moon, but at the time I didn’t feel anything. I felt I needed some plan, but I can’t reduce my meetings due to the nature of my work.

Then I thought of Suh Yoon Lee. I remembered a university hospital professor who had called her “the most pragmatic guru who has answers to any problem”. I downloaded YooooN Magazine from the App Store right away. As I read through the issues, I felt certain she had an answer for me.

Therefore, I want to ask Suh Yoon: how can I recharge my own energy when I’m so tired of meeting people that I feel like a dead phone battery?

-Robert from Chicago

 

A: I have a solution that can help you both: spending time alone. This means spending time away from others so you can completely examine yourselves. Lucky people have this in common. No matter how busy they are, they ensure they have some alone time to reflect on themselves.

People nowadays spend a great deal of time learning about trends and considering what others think, but they don’t know themselves very well. They aren’t sure where they are going or what they want. As Sun Tzu said in The Art of War, “If you know your enemies and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles; …if you do not know your enemies nor yourself, you will be imperiled in every single battle.”

Turn your attention to yourself at these times and closely examine your own mind. Take a step back to observe yourself and ask these questions:

What do I truly want?

What era am I currently at in my life?

What talents do I have?

Am I really living a happy life now?

To truly have time for yourself, you must first choose a place where your mind can be at ease. It’s best to spent at least 30 minutes alone. No meditation or formalities are needed. You can read, listen to music, take a bath, and relieve your stress. However, I do recommend temporarily shutting off your TV and phone. Unilateral, indiscriminate contact with media impedes your communication with yourself.

Next, let your thoughts naturally rise to the surface and face them. Don’t judge them as good or bad, but keep a calm mind. In this process, you can discover your current life and learn what fills your inner mind. This alone time will recharge your depleted energy and help keep you alert. Listen carefully to your sincere inner voice and you will become free of others’ judgment and stereotypes. This process will develop your inner strength to bring you good fortune and naturally tell you which path to take.

Suh Yoon's Quotes

“Spend time alone. This means spending time away from others so you can completely examine yourselves. Lucky people have this in common.” “Listen carefully to your sincere inner voice and you will become free of others’ judgment and stereotypes. This process will develop your inner strength to bring you good fortune and naturally tell you which path to take.” “Let your thoughts naturally rise to the surface and face them. Don’t judge them as good or bad, but keep a calm mind. In this process, you can discover your current life and learn what fills your inner mind.”